Friday, October 3, 2014
Don't Believe What Shame Shouts at You
Shame says, "You're not enough because you don't do enough"
Shame says, "You ate those darn chips again, now you'll never be able to fit in those smaller jeans. Really, don't you have any self-control?"
Shame says, "You're not as pretty as so-and-so. Why are you even bothering?"
Shame says, "You'll never be as thin as her, so you just as well give up."
Shame says, "I bet your husband wishes you didn't have all that extra post-baby weight."
Shame says, "You've already botched eating well today, so why bother for the rest of the day?"
Shame says a lot of things. Shame pours down lies and heaps up all those yucky feelings of unworthiness, embarrassment, and not-enoughness.
Shame may convince you that you need to change some habits (such as feeling like you need to eat healthier because you feel ashamed every time you eat something not-so-healthy), but shame won't be on your side.
If I try to change the way I look because of all that shame is shouting at me, it won't create lasting or healthy change. I know this because I've tried it.
Today, I want us to shout truth louder than shame. Let's shame shame.
Truth says, "You are enough."
Truth says, "You can make healthy choices for your body."
Truth says, "You are beautiful."
Truth says, "Your husband loves and cherishes your body. Actually, he thinks you're pretty sexy."
Truth says, "Appreciate the beauty in others--not compare yourself to it."
Truth says, "You are loved--no matter your size."
Truth says, "Your body size, shape, or image does not define who you are."
Truth says, "You were created and knit together with purpose--every single inch of you."
Truth always trumps shame. But shame is often noisier or harder to shake. For me, it's a daily process--pushing down shame and repeating truth.
I want to listen to truth becuase I've been given a chance to live outside those walls of shame. Why would I choose to stay within them?
What does shame shout at you? What truth can you replace that with?